Friday, January 30, 2009
QUICK HITS
TEN STORIES TO EITHER MAKE YOU CRY, CURSE or LAUGH
1. "I WANT MY TWO DOLLARS"..goes a step further in Chicago.
2. Crazy Chick from Lost is selling underwear on Ebay for charity.
3. Suzanne Summers discusses her vaginal injections.
4. Could you imagine being the groom at this wedding?
5. Real life Live Free Die Hard movie?
6. Will these people rename the streets once his economic policies fail?
7. Pelosi may be the biggest liar in the history of congress.
8. Obama continues to create panic in order to pass his pork bill.
9. Jackson County is so full of crime that the have worn out their courthouse.
10. Kansas City HAS NO GANG PROBLEM. LOOK AWAY
A BLUE VALLEY FULL OF WELFARE FRAUD
First off, where the hell do the owners of this Housing project get off tarnishing the good name of Blue Valley? Nice try welfare bastards.
Another thing, how the hell do you only catch 45 out of 60 warrants? It's not like they are at work....
ALL OF YOUR GOING GREEN EFFORTS WILL SOON BE WASTED
The eruption of this volcano will have such an effect on the climate that all of the efforts of man will be undone just by its eruption.
Way to waste your life on a fake religion. Keep up the good work.
Way to waste your life on a fake religion. Keep up the good work.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
TRADEMARK - JOCO HO
In light of the upcoming great depression of the 21st century I would like to be on the front end of a few trademarked items. It is my hope that by trademarking the following word that I can support myself through the work of others during this time.JOCO HO
Married woman between the ages of 25-35 years old that are currently married to men 15 years older than them. These women do not work, do not have kids, do not cook, do not clean and do not have any skills that could transfer into the work place. The only thing that the JOCO HO must do is look good for their husband and not get caught sleeping with the gardener.
In other words these women have been leased out for a period of 15 years in which they will be traded in for a newer model with different features. Making them whores.
With the recession/depression looming their husbands will soon start struggling to pay the bills and ask their wife to help out by getting a job.
What skills does this woman have other than sleeping with older men for money? None. So she will soon be out on the corner of 119th and Metcalf looking for johns to cover her starbucks addiction.
WE NEED TO DROP "KC METRO" ASAP
Those of us in JOCO already knew this but it might be an eye opener for the hipster, wannabe, slum loving, crime promoting bastards to the East of us. Kansas City is one of the least popular cities in the nation.
Meanwhile CNN reports this about Overland Park.
Start using JOCO Metro right away to spur economic growth.
PISSED OFF
Does it piss anyone else off to see this psychotic bitch smiling while talking to her lawyer? I wanted to throw my laptop across my office after just seeing and reading this.
photo from FOX NEWS
photo from FOX NEWS
KCMO GETS MUCH NEEDED HELP FROM THE FEDS
Thanks to the census bureau the residents of KCMO will finally learn to count. This is something that the KCMOSD has failed to do for over 40 years.
GLOBAL WARMING KOOKS FACE SET BACK
Yesterday the leader of the church of Kook was punked in front of the Senate. The fact that this ass clown is the leader of this made up religion is further proof that there is a better chance of winning powerball than his claims of the world ending.
Wake up you dumb bastards and use your brains.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
50,000 visitors
50,000 visitors may not be that many hits (frankly I can't believe anyone reads this crap) but I DID IT. I would like to thank the following people for making this happen
KCMO & KCK gang bangers
KCMOSD
Environmental Wackos
Liberal Socialist Scum
The Mayor of KCMO
KCMO residents in general
Criminals, Hood Rats, junkies, arsonist, oh wait I already thanked KCMO residents
Without you none of this could of been possible.
KELLIE PICKLER
I have been looking for a reason to post a picture of her on my blog for over a year and I finally have one thanks to a Belton girls text messaging skills.
BIG NOSE DEFENDS BIG BUTT
My favorite line from the article "A week after the inauguration and with such a feeling of hope in the air for our country". SERIOUSLY SHE SAID THAT. BECAUSE OBAMA GOT ELECTED CHICKS HAVE THE GREEN LIGHT TO GO FROM HOT TO NOT WITHOUT A COMMENT MADE.
Note to the formerly big nosed one: She didn't mind cahsing in on her looks when she looked good so now that she looks like a Truck Driver she has to face the music.
OVER/UNDER
Today is the annual homeless person count in KCMO. I am not sure exactly how scientific this count is but last year they came up with aprox 1600.
Do you think this years number will be higher or lower than last year? I say higher by at least 200.
The window closes at 5pm.
THE WIRE
I for one am glad that local criminals read this blog and take my advice. Thank you gentlemen for giving more to put in The Wire section today.
1. KCK makes up for yesterday inactivity by doubling up their shooting efforts last night
2. The only thing surprising in this arrest is that it was booze and not meth.
QUICK HITS - DEPRESSING EDITION
It is nearly impossible to find a positive story regarding anything in this country any more. Read these stories as you take the knife to your wrists.
1. One mans tractor death is another mans future country song.
2. Only the liberals would believe that using scare techniques is good for the economy.
3. California is holding back Tax Refunds. THEY ARE HOLDING YOUR MONEY. Isn't that the same as getting robbed or extorted?
4. How timely is this? Just before Obama plans on anally raping this country for "infrastructure jobs" this study comes out stating that our infrastructure sucks. DO THEY THINK WE ARE STUPID!
5. More food that can kill you.
6. Proof that the banks of this country ARE NOW CONTROLLED BY THE GOVERNMENT.
7. Unemployment is up in every state of the union.
8. Government approved automobiles will have higher insurance rates. I can't wait for Obama to take over that industry too.
9. Democrats demonstrate once again that they are not for freedom of speech.
10. 900 BILLION.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
QUICK HITS - HALF TIME EDITION
TOP 10 stories being discussed by intelligent people in JOCO today. Pop up edition will be available at a later date for KCMOSD grads.
1. Normally I would feel sorry for someone that has human feces smeared all over their face. The victim here is a lawyer...
2. White Powder stories use to be a big deal. How lame are the people that tried this gag? Come up with some new material you pathetic unimaginative bastards.
3. Islamic blight will linger in the skies a little bit longer in KCMO.
4. Yet another Religious leader guilty of a sex crime. This time the victim was a 10 year old girl.
5. Lohan going the exact opposite way of Simpson.
6. A story about a 2 year old girl getting abused by her parents that is too sick to comment on. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK>
7. Doesn't this sound like something out of Doctor Evil's lab?
8. Canada a better example of capitalism than the United States? Might just be.
9. K State AD quits amid controversy.
10. Florida firefighter steals severed foot. Ewww.
GARDNERS TURN TO IMPRESS US
I am going to call for an Emergency Meeting of the SOJOCO Free Masons. This meeting will be yet another step in creating a "Blue Valley" county
Standoff and Gunshots in Gardner have pushed me over the edge.
Standoff and Gunshots in Gardner have pushed me over the edge.
MERRIAM
It has long been my belief that when white people give up on life in JOCO that they move to Merriam. Does it surprise anyone that a freaking METH HOUSE was found there? I would gladly trade Merriam to KCK for 4 season tickets to the speeday. Sound like an even trade to me.
THE WIRE
WHAT THE HELL IS THIS CRAP? Get off your ass's KCMO & KCK and put in some work damn it!
1. In the area that the Mayor of KCMO wanted blight rail to run through, a man was shot in the foot waiting for the bus...
2. Louisburg elementary school principal is a junkie.
THATS IT!
Monday, January 26, 2009
THE RECESSION WILL KILL YOU
The fact that more Americans are eating McDonalds now than before should scare the crap out of you. Have you thought about the trickle down effect this will have?
1. Recession hits so people look for food bargains
2. People settle on unhealthy crappy food guaranteed to clog your arteries.
3. As the recession expands so does the eating of McDonalds.
4. More and More people become obese and suffer from clogged arteries.
5. Insurance companies start increasing premiums in order to turn a profit.
6. Obese people show up at work less due to health reasons.
7. Production falls at companies trying to compete in hard economic times
8. Company is forced to pass along increased premiums to employees
9. Company goes out of business
10 go back to step 1
KCMO PARENTS KICK ASS
No not really. Once again the good people of KCMO haven't let me down. It appears that some families can't afford to feed their kids so the schools are now sending food home with them over the weekend.....Excuse me but where the hell is Social Services on this crap? A parent can loose their kid for spanking them BUT if you can't feed your kid you can keep him/her?
And when the hell did it become the responsibility of A School District to expand its reach to the home and weekends?
If you can't feed your kid do the right thing and give them to foster care where they can at least have a chance. If you wish to help feed a KCMO kid visit this link.
THE FALL OF JESSICA SIMPSON
I don't really know what to say about this other than I can't believe that is her.
LADIES TAKE NOTE: IF JESSICA SIMPSON LOOKS LIKE CRAP IN MOM JEANS IMAGINE WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE IN THEM.
The before and after pics I posted will make even the strongest man cry.
STRONG WINDS DEVESTATING THE STL
It appears that the high winds from the cold front that moved in over the weekend has made it so STL residents can now smell KCMO.
JOCO residents should be thankful that we are West of that place.
JOCO residents should be thankful that we are West of that place.
QUICK HITS
10 stories that idiots that don't read this blog probably will never hear about. Consider yourself part of the informed minority.
1. This story doesn't exactly give you the best visual going into a new week.
2. Pelosi thinks that abortions will stimulate the economy.
3. Obama continues to weaken this country.
4. First Lady is considered a sell out in the black community.
5. It just got a whole lot tougher for the Auto Industry courtesy of the liberal and chief.
6. It is a sellers market if you are looking to sell eggs or sperm. Eww.
7. Fat is contagious? Why isn't it ever something cool like hotness.
8. Australian scientist are way off on this one. The reason sex is better for men when drunk is simple, BEER GOGGLES.
9. Eddy Curry can't catch a break.
10. "uncle damon" ditches 3 year old at Chuck E. Cheese.
THE WIRE - WEEKEND KETCHUP
Even though the weather outside was a little chili this weekend there were some brave souls still willing to put in some work.
1. Gas station robberies are only a real crime when they take place at a Quick Trip. If you aren't safe at a QT the WHERE ARE YOU SAFE!
2. Missouri Criminal takes one look at KCK and decides to head back to KCMO during police chase.
3. Some Lawrence residents have seen too much MENACE II SOCIETY.
4. Wichita holds a KCMO reenactment this weekend. I think they nailed it.
5. In what could be the sickest crime this weekend a mother pimps out her 5 year old daughter in Wichita.
6. No details were given as to if the money was hauled away in paper or plastic.
7. If one wanted to How many families in KCMO could be arrested for starving their kids....
8. Independence Ave goes old school with a knife fight injuring 3.
9. The funniest part of this story is that there is a Museum on Quindaro. What the hell do they have on display there? Shell casings and police tape?
10. KCK residents solve homeless heating problem by torching vacants.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
FINALLY! TONY RIZZO NAILS IT
For over 2 years now I have been begging the media to pay some attention to the crime in KCMO. It wasn't until today (Sunday) that somebody finally did. The reporting on this story is incredible and Tony Rizzo should get an award for doing what the other chicken S*** people in the media wouldn't.
Friday, January 23, 2009
810 WHB ENGAGES IN POLITICS
I can't believe that I just heard the morons slip up on Between the Lines today. While at a remote they started promoting stem cell research and even questioned why people were against it. What a couple of idiots.
Be sure to let D Klink know how you feel about a sports reporter lecturing you on stem cell research dclinkscale@810whb.com
Be sure to let D Klink know how you feel about a sports reporter lecturing you on stem cell research dclinkscale@810whb.com
NOBODY IS SAFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Personally I think that people need to stop watching the news. With all of the bad stuff being reported about the economy everyone seems to have given up and quit trying. It is time for us to stop being reactionary to this crap and take charge and push on. Screw the media, politicians and economist! Do your job to the best of your ability, cut back on your spending and push forward!
More layoffs.
1. It is sad that even video game manufactures are laying people off.
2. GE's profit nearly cut in half.
3. The government control of banks is in full effect. Do you trust these bastards with your cash? Who is to say that they don't start taxing your checking account (since the control it) for midnight basketball programs?
4. KU is laying off 11 hippies
5. Harley Davidson cutting workforce. NOOO!!!!!
HOW BAD IS KCK?
Bad enough for a man to off himself. No reason has been given yet but I am sure once he came to grips with the fact that he will never make it to JOCO and reside in KCK his whole life he figured why live.. Poor Bastard.
QUICK HITS - FREAKY FRIDAY EDITION
1. Will muslims look the other way when Obama kills muslims? I thought that dems thought that killing terrorists is the reason we got attacked...
2. Environmental wackos only care about "global warming" when it is convenient and they need they are out of thing to bitch about.
3. This would be a great idea for a prison movie.
4. Obama is clueless when it comes to Israel.
5. British man give you tips on how to handle facebook conflicts with your wife.
6. Does Obama have the temperment to handle the stress of the job?
7. Did the Chinese government run the Obama innagurarion?
8. Whats the deal with Asains in Virginia? This time the weapon of choice is a ginsu knive to behead someone. That doesn't sound like a quick and painless death.
9. When this guy is done with Kosovo maybe he can help out KCMO, that is if he is up to the challenge.
10. John McCain starring in THE SELLOUT.
THE OBAMA PLAN
The Obama plan to deal with detainees at Gitmo seems like an even more brilliant idea after reading this story. I hope that Obama can live with himself if one of the guys he cuts loose ends up killing thousands of Americans.
MISSOURI INBREEDERS
Those of us that live in JOCO have suspected Missourians of inbreeding for decades. Here is some more proof to back up our theory.
THE SICK BASTARD THAT DID THIS NEEDS TO BE SENT TO GITMO BEFORE IT CLOSES
THE SICK BASTARD THAT DID THIS NEEDS TO BE SENT TO GITMO BEFORE IT CLOSES
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