THE SOURCE OF PAIN FOR SOME MARRIED MEN

Today while I was hard at work in my office I was flipping through the Pitch website (as I said it is great lunchtime reading) and stumbled across this little story. It appears that Lee Jeans is the company behind the hideous creation known as "mom jeans". These jeans are the most depressing thing I have ever seen on a woman. Even more sickening then fat women wearing spandex and even worst than stirrup pants.

These jeans completely destroy the appearance of a woman and should be outlawed at once.

Since this is a JOCO company I am all in favor of putting together a picket line in front of their building next week.

Nothing says "I don't give a crap anymore" like a woman wearing mom jeans.

SANTA AND THE DUTCH OVEN

So ummm who has bought one of these?

HAPPY FESTIVUS YOU BASTARDS

LEARY TUESDAYS

GOOD NEWS KCMO

In 9 days your murder stats get to go back to zero and all will be forgotten!

SCROOGE LINKS

Just to remind you that Scrooge is more than a movie. I pulled these headlines to the side to remind you that while most of us are celebrating this week in our comfortable JOCO homes, there are those out there not as fortunate as us. There are also people out there that want to ruin our way of life and will not rest until we are as miserable as them.

1. 13 year old kid that was tied to a tree and tortured for 18 hours back in June couldn't make it to Christmas.

2. Road Rage in Dallas kills 2 people. Tis da season.

3. Remember the Boston Tea Party? Good, cus we may need to drop some tea in a harbor again if these bastards get their way.

4. Don't these people know that the only acceptable time to steal is in a time of crisis. Looting is much cooler than shoplifting.

5. Gang raping lesbians isn't included in the 12 days of Christmas is it? On a side note she was raped which should be punishable by death, so I don't understand why they had to include the fact that she was a lesbian in the story.

6. The people of Venezuela are being denied one of the finest dining venues ever conceived (THE FOOD COURT) by their dictator.

7. Iowa man guilty of selling Teen Girls off for Christmas.

8. Milkman turns Dopeman. Nothing says Merry Christmas more than buying your Grandma a dime bag.

9. Your Christmas Hot Chocolate may kill you, seriously.

10. Your Wii could kill you, not so seriously.

COLD WEATHER IS DEVESTATING KCMO

If you don't believe me then read this story......Done? Ok, have you noticed that the aim of KCMO residents has started to slip lately? Well imagine trying to aim a weapon in a moving car while wearing gloves.. Poor bastards should seriously think about unionizing so that they can get all of their killing done from April - October. This is no weather to be out shooting up houses.

ANYONE ELSE SICK OF THIS GLOBAL WARMING CRAP?

The balmy temperatures that we have had so far this winter makes me believe that there might be something to this Global Warming stuff. I would post more but I am headed to the pool......

HIP HOP FLASH BACK

THE BLOGGER REACH AROUND

Has anyone else been noticing the circle jerk going on amongst local bloggers? It is enough to make an Ethiopian spit up his last piece of rice. "Your blog is awesome", "Nooooo, your blog is the best", "Will you be my BFF?" To quote one Charles Brown, GOOD GRIEF. Get over yourselves people.

THE GREATEST CHRISTMAS TREE EVER?

CELEBRATE DIVERSITY KANSAS!

If you are a person of pale pigment living in KCK you are a minority.

THE WIRE - WEEKEND KETCHUP

I wonder how the cold weather effected the hardworking killers, dealers, bangers and whores of the Metro area.

1. Mental Case loose in KCK. Talk about finding a needle in a haystack............

2. Metro residents living in rural areas are no longer safe from the criminals ways of KCMO.

3. The odds of actually running across a taxi while in the metro are slim to none. That is what makes the story of this recent KCK shooting victim all that much more incredible.

4. Who hasn't killed someone this way??????????????

5. Lee's Summit is slowly turning into a KCMO anex. Yet another shooting in the burbs.

6. Talk about using your resources. This is a great story about a local prison escape.

QUICK HITS

If you read these stories you will have something to talk about today. So be interesting today instead of your usual dry, boring, ignorant self.

1. It is a good day in America when Union workers have to go without work for a month. Merry Christmas UAW from Chrysler.

2. Is the eating of cats really the biggest "RIGHTS" problem the people of China are facing?

3. Is anyone going to shed a tear over an MSNBC reporter getting mugged?
4. SURPRISE!!!!!!!!!!!!! not really. Obama Stimulus package is going to be full of pork. I thought Muslims hated pork?

5. Can you really trust the Church nowadays?????????????????

6. How do I get one of these bags?
7. I didn't think that the G Spot was such a controversial subject?

8. KCMO IS FIGHTING CRIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Just kidding, they are instead focusing in on invading your privacy and preventing red light running.

9. Wal Mart removes Pro Islamic doll from shelves.
10. OOPS!