TEETER TOTTER, SWING, SLIDE, CRACK HEAD

The hippie drop out residents of Lawrence, Ks (gods country) have lost their freaking minds. Homeless camps in parks? For a city that considers themselves "Green" they are clueless. Have they considered the environmental impact on these parks from the bums? Broken bottles, needles, feces, urine and trash aren't exactly good for green space set aside for people to enjoy.

And who the hell is going to take their kids to a park filled with homeless people "camping". Would you let your kid swing next to Hobo Joe and Crack head Mike?

Idiots.

THE WIRE - SHOOTINGS, ARSON AND ASS KICKINGS

It is good to see that violent crime is back in KCMO. We missed you. Also I have to give props to the people of Independence for the strangest arson I have ever seen. KCK you are on notice!

1. 2 shot, 1 killed in a shooting in Kansas City, Missouri. I will have to remember that line for my 12 days of a KCMO Christmas Carol next year.

2. You gotta admire the fight that these two had in them. Not only did they hold off cops for 6 hours BUT they did it in a freaking burning building as their skin melted. Makes you wonder if there was something more to this doesn't it?

3. Can you imagine all the great smart ass comments you could make as you kicked someones ass in a Burger King parking lot? It almost makes it worth it.

THE WIRE - WEEKEND KETCHUP

Gangs bangers wear panchos? One would have to assume so after reading THE WIRE today. We got shootings, ho smacking, stabbings and found bodies. If you are reading this from your home congratulations, you made it through another weekend. If you are reading this from the hospital then learn to duck.

1. There is no such thing as a natural death in KCMO so don't fall for the attempt at stat cooking.

2. KCK's Argentine district joins in on the fun.

3. How does a conversation go after you get shot in KCMO "Hey do you want me to call the ambo or should we just check ourselves in?" Good lord. Note: If I get shot I want my ass life flighted, screw the ambulance and driving myself.

4. Kansas City was once known for its beautiful blvds. Now we know them as killing fields.

5. The violence in this college town is out of control. There were more stabbings in Lawrence this weekend than K State
victories in Hoops in the past 20 years(in Lawrence).

6. East Side religious leader reaches back and smacks a Ho. Even the Pastors in the inside are freaking gangsters.

THE WIRE - MURDERERS DAY OFF

Did KCMO/KCK shooters stay inside due to wind last night? WTF is this taking the day off crap? If I have to drag my ass to the office on Mondays then so should you.

1. If you own a Hispanic grocery store in the metro you should be prepared to get jacked for your pesos.

2. Man that kills dog by ass raping it has to see a shrink.......

3. Robber crashes into the only restaurant on the plaza that folks from KCK can afford.

4. FINALLY A ROBBERY THAT MAKES SENSE! It is about time the crooks of this city figure out that robbing apartments in the projects is not as lucrative as hitting up Mission Hills.

5. It isn't safe to eat a Burrito Bowl in waldo.

THE WIRE - WEEKEND KETCHUP

There was something for everyone in the wire today.

1. KCMO Killers work 24 hours a day. Lucky for this guy that the overnight crew has bad aim.

2. The economy is starting to effect the loot of Lawrence stick up men.

3. Bank robbers hit a triple on Saturday morning.

4. KCMO residents never know what they will find in their yards in the morning. Dead bodies seem to be the norm though.

5. Another bar shooting in Lawrence.

THE WIRE - STEADY MOBBIN'

"its better to be judged by 12 than carried by six" seemed to be the words of the weekend in the news.

1. Friendship Village sounds like a weird place to have a shooting..... That is until you find out it is in KCMO.

2. KCMO violence is starting to spill into the burbs of Mo. This time it was two people shot in Blue Springs.

3. Lawrence, Ks returns back to its thugish ways when two people don't get it their way in a BK parking lot.

4. You know your gangster when you pull a gun on a an old dude that can't leave his bed.

5. KCMO Shooters Hit 4 and kill 2.

6. Independence gets into the game with yet another homicide.

RED ROVER, RED ROVER

BEND FIDO ON OVER???

THE WIRE

Another successful day of protecting JOCO for SOB MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Omega man on the other hand...........
1. Gunshot wounds have become so common in the East Side that the residents can't even tell if they have been shot. Either this guy and his friends are total dumb ass's or well these guys are total dumb ass's.

2. What was the Missouri basketball team doing in Lawrence last night?

3. KCMO thieves utilize the internet to rob rednecks.

4. Missouri teacher accused of raping a 13 year old girl for 3 years.

5. Missouri woman found buried in concrete and stuffed in toolbox. This guy must of really hated his wife to lose a tool box over it.

6. Even the wildlife in Missouri is gangster.

7. The recession has forced robbers to use hairspray to attack their victims.