Natalie Portman is Hot

QUICK HITS

1. All of my flights on Southwest Airlines confirms what these two girls are saying.

2. Kids get a lesson in the food chain by python.

3. KCMO school district has an "early college campus" opening? Finally something to challenge Union Station for poor turnout. What's next, a Nordstroms on Prospect?

4. KCK drug market faces setback.

5. This could be the only thing that the mayor of kcmo hasn't been accused of doing.

ARE YOU DARKER THAN THE BAG?

That is the question that students faced at Schlagle yesterday. It appears that instead of teaching kids history, math, english & science the "educators" at the before mentioned place of learning feel that skin color should be the focus this week.

Seriously, this is freaking funny. KCK is the best!

If I was one of these kids being split up by the color of my skin compared to a freaking sack I would be pissed.

Brown bags lead to brown signs on the side of the road begging for change.

872 UNSKILLED WORKERS TO HIT JOB MARKET

If the job market in the metro is a toilet then it is about to have the biggest turd it has ever seen chip the porcelain.

QUICK HITS

1. Chaos will strike the homosexual community at 5:30pm.

2. 7 year old crack dealer takes Jersey by storm.

3. Just when you think you have gotten in all of the candidates for the 2008 Mother of the Year award............. This chicks 16 month old tests positive for cocaine.

4. Hollywood nails the casting description for the people of West Virginia. Finally a career path for K State Grads.

5. KCMO shows once again why they are considered the Varsity squad. Murder number 17 today puts them 8 ahead of the pace they were on for last year. Could this be a record year?

6. Catholic Church is against the Science City body exhibit, saying it isn't suitable for kids.......If I was the PR rep for Science City I would shoot a reply back "Are Catholic Priest suitable for kids".

7. Bad aim to blame for this poor attempt at murder in KCMO. Swope just isn't what it use to be back in the 90's.

8. KCK will now be producing some of the funniest reality shows ever. Good god these tapes are going to be funny.

WELCOME BACK

My theory of cold weather preventing crimes in the hood held up once again. Today was a balmy 48 degrees and guess who made it back into the headlines?
KCK
1. Man shot in his car while cruising scenic Parallel Parkway.

2. Death of infant under investigation off of N. 33rd street.

3. Remember the days when murderers had some work ethic? If you killed someone you took the corpse into the woods or dumped them into the river. Now they are just dropping bodies in manhole covers in KCK.
UPDATE: It turns out they were animal bones. Still pretty damn lazy.

I for one would like to welcome you back to the headlines. This place just isn't the same without you.

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