Tonight begins another long journey of American Idol. This show is basically the same every year yet we continue to watch it for some reason.
Things you can count on
1. The hot chick with a so/so voice will advance to the round of 12
2. There will be a contestant with a checkered past.
3. The auditions will be full of ass clowns making fools of themselves to get on TV.
4. Paula will walk out on Simon
5. The celeb judges will think everyone is great
6. The winner will not sell as many albums as the runner up
7. The fat african american chick will have the best voice.
9. The term "pitchy" will be used over 2,000 times.
10. Simon and Ryan will call each other out for being in the closet.
11. At least 15 of the people that audition will cry.
12. The term "fugly" will be used inside viewers homes through out the auditions.
13. There will be 10 stand out performances and the rest will be average.
14. Lounge singer, Cabaret, wedding singer etc... will all be used to describe average performances.
15. They will purposely advance another Sanjaya type.
16. A blond will make it to the final 4
17. There will be at least one guy that is considered "a rocker", one chick that is "alternative", 2 chicks will be labeled "country", etc.....
18. My DVR will not work at least 2 times this season.
19. The media will think that Simon is to mean
20. The finale will be 2 hours long and only 5 minutes will matter.
There now you don't need to watch.
