Wednesday, October 01, 2008


I have been inspired by Midtowns ability to capture fall in Midtown.

1. Influx of KCK/KCMO school kids working day shifts at retail establishments due to JOCO kids leaving their summer jobs for college.

2. Festivals - The towns of JOCO love to put on a festival to show off to our neighbors to the North and East that we (unlike them) are capable of having more than 20 people in a street event without gunfire.

3. Christmas Items in Stores - I was at Target the other day and they had just as much Christmas stuff up as they did Halloween.

4. Trick or Treating - Every year bus loads (not kidding) of inner city youth get dropped off in our neighborhoods to ask for Candy. Sure we here in JOCO have some houses with great halloween decorations but aren't their neighborhoods truly scary. The only Halloween decoration I plan on putting up is a street sign in front of my house that says 40th and Prospect.

5. School Fund Raisers - This is the biggest shakedown in US history. Not only do we pay taxes for public schools, enrollment fees, activity fees etc.. but now we get to buy over priced candy bars and crappy giftwrap to support the schools. Hell even the Mafia only collected once.

6. Teenagers driving at rush hour - Do I really need to expand on Biff & Amber driving their new Lexus at 100mph through school zones while eating or putting on makeup?

7. Lawn Care Wars - This is the time of season in which the competition picks up between neighbors and their lawns. From leaf pick up to fertilization, this is where the rubber meets the road. Those who have neglected their lawns all spring and summer will be dubbed trash by the rest of the neighborhood.

8. Charity Drives - This is the time of year in which the calls start coming into JOCO residents to help save KCMO. Every year the fine upstanding residents reach into their pockets and donate Hundreds of thousands of dollars to feed and clothe those living in the East side. We do this despite their hatred for us and ask for nothing in return (except for a tax write off).

9. Election signs - Oh yes my favorite. Each fall we get to see the wonderful display of election signs in yards and on the corners of busy intersections. I always find it a great way to find out who the commies are in the neighborhood.

10. Layoffs at Sprint are on the Horizon. Sure this can be said about every season but the fall layoffs always seem to be the biggest and best hidden.