Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Be thankful Southern Johnson County

This month has been full of people on Facebook posting about how thankful they are for all the obvious crap.  Like we didn't know that you were thankful for your family etc..  Come on, nobody wants to read that crap.  

The good people of Southern Johnson County have a lot of reasons to be thankful for as a group.  Here are 17 to get you started.

1.  We aren't subsidizing 2 laughing stock pro sports teams.
2.  Our Eastside is Leawood.  Yeah I know the people in Leawood are douche bag wannabe frat guys and sorority girls BUT they don't shoot at us from the golf carts.
3.  Mobile homes are used by construction crews instead of primary housing for residents.
4.  Heritage Park > Swope Park
5.  Pools > Bacteria filled fountains
6.  It would take us over a decade to equal the number of murders that KCMO has in one year.
7.  Fairway, Merriam, Mission, Roeland Park serve as a great DMZ.
8.  "I'm Kyle James Bitch!" has never been said in our area by Kyle James.
9.  Overland Park Mayor never has to duck behind bushes at Town Center Plaza due to gunshots.
10.  We know that Toy Trains belong under the Christmas Tree not our streets.
11.  Not a single street named Cleaver (let alone 2).
12.  We don't take gondola rides on a creek filled with our feces.
13.  All of our Hipsters now live in KCMO and nowhere near us.
14.  Our hookers work out of hotels and not alleys
15.  The jackass's of Prairie Village  don't have quick highway access to our part of town.
16.  Working for food is what we do and not a sign that we hold.
17.  5.9% is our unemployment rate not our graduation rate