Friday, May 09, 2008

BIKE WEEK????????????


It has just come to my attention(thanks tony) that next week is going to be the most dangerous week for motorists of the year. Next week there will be armies of ultra thin people draped in spandex and retarded helmets taking up traffic lanes meant for cars. Next week the streets will be filled with "that guy", the guy that thinks that climbing a hill at 3mph is manly, taking up a traffic lane that is 6 feet wide with a bike that is 6 inches wide is their right, that wearing yellow bracelets will put them in the tour de france and the same ahole that picks rush hour to "train". Next week is BIKE WEEK!

If they want to have a week, no problem, make it the 3rd week of December. Do we really need to start off spring with a week that reminds us how annoying these people are?

This week will be a war of good vs. evil. Celebrate bike week with getting up behind one of these morons and riding your horn as they climb that hill. Cut them off at intersections. Screw the turn signal, let them look for your arm as you signal right and turn left. Slow down while in front of them to drink your coffee. Give them maps that show them where the BIKE TRAILS ARE! The metro has spent $$$$$$$$$ to give these jerkoffs a place to safely ride, USE THEM. The key here is to be creative and have fun with it and to remind these people that there is no such thing as THE TOUR DE JOCO.

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

QUICK HITS



1. Financial Gap? On one hand Overland Park is going to spend $13,000,000 on artificial turf for a kids soccer stadium. On the other side of the tracks, there is an estimated 2,000 teens homeless in the Metro. Do people really care about the homeless when the weather is nice?

2. If you own stock in Google, Intel, Clearwire etc... SELL, SELL, SELL. Everything Sprint touches turns to crap so why wouldn't this venture?

3. KCK man plots against JOCO resident. This should put KCK on notice, JOCO is watching you!

4. The strike isn't even a week old and these guys are already feeling the pain? To quote Charles Brown..."Good Grief". Their leadership is doing a great job of taking care of them.

5. Opportunistic Bastard: SO now the Cyclone is a result of Global Warming????? Haven't these things been happening for 1000's of years? What's next, Earthquakes?

6. Global Warming causes Volcano to erupt in Chile.

7. Teacher called wizard and fired for performing a magic trick.

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

THE WIRE


This show might have a bigger following now that it is over than it did while it was up and running. I came across this great link for a character break down today that covers all 5 seasons.

WASTE OF TIME & EFFORT


The headline reads "school district needs significant improvements". WELL NO CRAP! Everyone knows that. The thing that everyone wants to know is what the hell are you going to do to improve it? After reading the article all that I could find was that the school district will have to file quarterly reports and put on a good dog and pony show for inspectors....

Are these the same people that are looking for Bin Laden? How the hell do 2oo people inspect the school district and think that they are on the path to accreditation?

This crap is hilarious.

UNION LEMMINGS


Your company is:
1. Getting its ass kicked financially
2. Losing out on market share to Asian manufactures.
3. Shipping jobs to Canada & Mexico
4. Has closed plants in other cities
5. Is being forced by the government to meet ridiculous EPA standards.
6. HAS EMPLOYED SOME OF YOU FOR OVER 30 years.

AND YET YOUR LEADERSHIP TELLS YOU THAT A STRIKE IS A GOOD IDEA!

You union lemmings deserve what you get after this latest stunt. I am all for stuff being made in America by American workers but these crybaby union workers deserve to be either replaced by a robot or have their plant closed and reopened in Mexico. Better yet, BRING IN THE SCABS. I am sure that they could do the same job that you do, only cheaper and more efficient.
Ask yourselves the following questions

1. What value do you bring to GM besides complacency and a sense of entitlement?

2. How do you give GM a competitive advantage?

3. Do rising employment costs help you beat Honda or Toyota?

4. Are the members of your Union that are close to retirement making decisions that benefit those of the whole group or just themselves? Seems to me that the Senior members are only looking out for themselves on this one.

5. Where exactly are you going to find work other than at the Fairfax plant? It's not like there are a lot of options for you out there.

6. When was the last time that you heard about a GM car lasting longer than a Honda or Toyota?

7. Do you have benefits? Do you have a retirement plan? Do you have people that have worked there for over 30 years? Do you get a check every week? Consider yourself lucky.

8. Have you met an employed Steel Worker in the US? Pretty rare huh?

9. Where do your union dues go? Are you going to be able to pay ALL of your bills while on Strike?

10. Are you incapable of thinking for yourself? Why do you need a "union chief" to tell you what to do, when to work etc.... I guarantee that the leaders of your Union won't miss a house payment while you are on strike


A job is not an entitlement. They don't have to bring your ass's back.

Monday, May 05, 2008

80 DEGREE DAY - VIOLENCE UPDATE


Is it safe to say that if you live in KCMO that your life is going to be hell this summer? Seriously, buy some kevlar, get a Desert Eagle and get bullet proof glass because it is only going to get worst.

1. Crime pays - The guy that shot this dude on College today escaped in a Lexus. I wonder what type of gas millage he gets going from murder to murder? Evading the police has got to be bad for the environment.

Screw it, there are too many to list. Carjackings, murder, shooting and shooting. Basically a Number 3 meal super sized with a side of child abandonment. The menu never changes, only the quantities. I am getting carpal tunnel from this crap.

Sunday, May 04, 2008

RAMBLINGS


1. Who the hell watches the Kentucky derby? This is the only uninteresting sport involving midgets there is in the world. The fact that they call them Jockeys instead of midgets baffles me as well.

2. How many burglars case out neighborhood garage sales? These guys get to case out every house in the neighborhood with no questions asked, bad idea.

3. Delusions of Grandeur - Han Solo said it best.

4. Credibility - Those without any are always the first to advise (unsolicited). See also Glasshouses.

5. Replacements & Stand Ins - Can not be trusted.

6. I would much rather get 17 MPG than drive a Geo metro powered by a 9volt battery.

7. Ignorance Island - The population there keeps increasing.

8. How does some place have the best Tacos? The ingredients are all basically the same. Every time this debate comes up the person I am arguing with brings up the salsa. Doesn't that just mean they have the best Salsa?

9. Kansas City Hip Hop = Italian food in Alaska

10. Those that bitch about their situation in life rarely are brave enough to do anything about it and usually end up making it worst by rationalizing their decisions (or lack there of).

11. I have no idea how to cut up a watermelon without butchering it.

12. Thank god you can buy precut watermelon.

13. There is no such thing as making "enough" money.

14. Why couldn't my neighbors trampoline of been destroyed in the storm?

15. Did Katie Horner purposely use blood red on her weather map last week? Wouldn't surprise me.

16. When are they going to rebroadcast the episode of The Office from last week? And why does a channel with another station for weather have to interrupt our TV Viewing? Can't they run a banner along the bottom of the screen saying TUNE INTO CHANNEL 1345?

17. On St. Patrick's Day people always claim to be part Irish. On May 5th do people claim to be Mexican?

18. I hate it when I order a Diet Coke at a restaurant and they ask me if Diet Pepsi is ok. If I wanted Pepsi, wouldn't I of ordered Pepsi? If I order steak are you going to bring me chicken?

19. I have become even more leery of charities that tell you to send in money instead of goods and services. I heard the spokesperson for the local Salvation Army office telling people that all they needed was money. Aren't these groups the same ass clowns that were full of scandal during Katrina fund raising? I trust them almost as much as I trust Ice Cream Truck Dude.

20. Today I was told that I wasn't religious but spiritual by a local religious leader. I have no clue what that means.

21. Right after I was told that I was hit up for a donation.