Tuesday, December 23, 2008

THE TWELVE DAYS OF A KCMO CHRISTMAS


This is a rough draft so bare with me.

12 School superintendents

11 homicides in planning

10 Vacant homes a burning

9 Teachers striking

8 "Mammies" a milking

7 Companies closing

6 Car jackings

5 an arena with VACANCYYYYYYY

4 City Counsel turds

3 Conventions Leaving

2 Teams that suck

AND A CRAPPY MAYORS CHRISTMAS TREE

THE SOURCE OF PAIN FOR SOME MARRIED MEN


Today while I was hard at work in my office I was flipping through the Pitch website (as I said it is great lunchtime reading) and stumbled across this little story. It appears that Lee Jeans is the company behind the hideous creation known as "mom jeans". These jeans are the most depressing thing I have ever seen on a woman. Even more sickening then fat women wearing spandex and even worst than stirrup pants.

These jeans completely destroy the appearance of a woman and should be outlawed at once.

Since this is a JOCO company I am all in favor of putting together a picket line in front of their building next week.

Nothing says "I don't give a crap anymore" like a woman wearing mom jeans.

SANTA AND THE DUTCH OVEN

So ummm who has bought one of these?

HAPPY FESTIVUS YOU BASTARDS

LEARY TUESDAYS

GOOD NEWS KCMO


In 9 days your murder stats get to go back to zero and all will be forgotten!