KCMO NEVER LETS ME DOWN

I almost feel sorry for the poor bastards stranded on the other side of the border. The leadership that they currently have MIGHT be the worst these parts have seen since well, General Custer.

Think about this for a minute. Let us say that you live in a community with increased violent crime and arsonist setting vacants on fire every night. If you were the leader of this community which of the following would you do for the police and fire departments.

a. Keep funding the same but make leadership changes

b. Increase funding and make leadership changes.

c. Increase funding and give leadership one more chance with more resources

d. CUT FUNDING FROM THE PROGRAMS WHEN THEY ARE NEEDED MOST

Seriously, if you are still living in KCMO wake the F UP. Leave, run, walk, crawl, charter a blimp, purchase a burrow DO SOMETHING and get out of that place.

THE THINGS YOU LEARN ON THIS HERE INTERNET

Until I read this story I didn't think that Spring Hill had electricity( based off of the people that I have met from there). Good for them. Next stop indoor plumbing

QUICK HITS - EARLY UPDATE.

1. Things are so bad in KCMO that the residents have started robbing the post office. Is it possible to put a stamp on lay a way?

2. KCMO throws in the towel on violent crime and spends extra money on fighting traffic. It is good to see the leadership of that community finally realizing that in order to stop murders they must arrest people speeding.

3. KCMO's soultion to economic problems is to "tax suberbinites at attractions like the zoo". If that is the case they are really screwed. Why would any self respecting JOCOian pay extra to go to that crappy zoo. More on this further down.

4. In related news the Nelson Art Gallery is going to have to start laying people off. If you are facing a budget crunch it makes sense for the leadership in your city to make the attractions more expensive.

5. Anyone else think its funny that the biggest bad ass in KCMO is a chick?

6. Thank god for the city Union Mission. Could you imagine sleeping outside in this weather?

BIRD vs PLANE..........

You would think that airplanes MIGHT be designed to handle hitting birds. But to believe that you must also believe that most people posses common sense and a 1st grade education.

THE SOLUTION TO OUR BUDGET WOES ARE SO SIMPLE

That's right, weed. Now that the government is writing trillion dollar checks like its nothing we may need to think about how it is that we plan on paying it back.

To me the answer is simple, legalize marijuana and the tax it like cigs. This will do two things, increase revenue streams coming into the government and save us money in law enforcement.

Like Redman says "Legalize and I will advertise"

VIRGIN UPDATE: 3.7 million dollar bid is in

GOOD FOR HER!

PIMPIN AIN'T EASY

Just ask these broads.

RODNEY CARRINGTON - WAL MART

QUICK HITS

These are the best stories on the internet today (so far). Any other stories that you have read up to this point suck. You should be ashamed of yourself for wasting your time reading them and trying to understand them without my help.

1. The KCMO school board takes 1.4 million dollars away from students because of their stupidity.

2. The worlds biggest badminton fan is dead.
3. Good news for Reality TV fans. If things keep up down in Mexico we could soon be watching a civil war. There hasn't been anything good on TV since we destroyed Iraq.

4. News isn't broke. What's broke is old media and the sooner these idiots get with the program the sooner we can stop hearing them cry.

5. The driving force in modern technology is taking 6 months off due to health.

6. Anytime there are monkeys on the loose throwing feces they make the headlines.

7. Reason for death "falling of deck in cold weather". That's a crappy way to go.

8. Hitler saved in Jersey

9. Some people are jealous of attractive women. These people are often other women.

10. I just feel so bad that this oil sheik doesn't get to finish his building.

THANK YOU ISRAEL

Did anyone else chuckle and cheer when they learned that Israel shelled the UN?

HILLBILLIES FIND TOOTH BRUSH

Those of us in JOCO can breath a sigh of relief. It appears that the hillbillies surrounding the great county of JO have learned how to use a toothbrush. Congrats and Thank You. Before you know it you will be moving out of your sod houses and branching out your family tree.

THE DEATH OF KHAN

I don't believe he is dead. I think he will come back in a couple years as a sequel.

SLUTISM STUDIES

Here is another example of our government wasting money on unimportant research projects. Researchers have determined that high levels of estrogen can make you a slut. Didn't we know this all ready? Let me save you a couple billion dollars and expand on your research.

1. Booze
2. Daddy Issues
3. Low Self Esteem
4. Narcotics
5. Price of batteries
6. Jealousy of Friends
7. Genetics - If your mom was a slut chances are that you will be a slut

Thes are few more things that increase slutism in women.

LINK FIXED

QUICK HITS

A wide variety of stories that you need to read today.

1. Teenage girls that take pictures of themselves can be charged with child porn...No word on the rumor that those caught masturbating will be charged with raping themselves.

2. Is it really news that Bin Laden dislikes Israel?

3. Pelosi blames Bush for the last 350 and promises that this 350 will be spent better. Does anyone trust this chick?

4. If women can smell this then we might as well stop blaming the dog for other smells.

5. Saudi child rape continues.
6. Hollywood Elitist refuses to turn himself in for Rape Charges. Typical.

7. Whatever happened to the phrase "bag it before you nab it" ? Get with it you STD ridden bastards.

8. Metro residents can now watch as weather people over react to the temperature outside.

9. Kansas coeds beware. There is a rapist going between KU and that ag school down the road.

10. Law passed in 2005 could be to blame for our economic crap hole.

“It was only a matter of time before we had our first gay superhero"

Not that there is anything wrong with that.......