I am having an Earth Day sale on Dolphin Steaks. Put your orders in early because they wont last. Buy two and I will throw in a package of polar bear franks and breaded penguin.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
MULTIPLICITY
Yeah I know that cloning humans is bad etc... trust me I am not in favor of this BUT since it is here and probably not going anywhere we need to find the positives. The best way to do this in my opinion is to watch the movie multiplicity. What we learn from this is that with the proper scheduling, a room over the garage and a clueless wife you can pull it off. Just don't do more than 3 clones of yourself or you will have a clone with the IQ of a liberal.
THE WIRE - SHOOTINGS, ARSON AND ASS KICKINGS
It is good to see that violent crime is back in KCMO. We missed you. Also I have to give props to the people of Independence for the strangest arson I have ever seen. KCK you are on notice!
1. 2 shot, 1 killed in a shooting in Kansas City, Missouri. I will have to remember that line for my 12 days of a KCMO Christmas Carol next year.
2. You gotta admire the fight that these two had in them. Not only did they hold off cops for 6 hours BUT they did it in a freaking burning building as their skin melted. Makes you wonder if there was something more to this doesn't it?
3. Can you imagine all the great smart ass comments you could make as you kicked someones ass in a Burger King parking lot? It almost makes it worth it.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
MURDER OR LOVE - A CRAIGSLIST STORY
Whoever timed the story about finding a Prom Date on Craigslist has to be fired today. Why would anyone be celebrating people meeting on Craigslist the day that the Craigslist murderer is captured? Seriously that story should of been scrapped, especially considerring that we live in a city full of morons.
BBQ & JAZZ
Last week I made a post that discussed what Kansas City is known for and what a huge lie it is. Two of them happened to be BBQ & Jazz Music. After I made this post I got emails and nasty comments saying that I was completely wrong. Well, it turns out that even when you combine 2 of the supposed things that KCMO is known for nobody in this town cares.
Don't for a minute fall for the recession crap. I did some checking around and other towns aren't having any problems with their events.
Monday, April 20, 2009
QUICK HITS - WATER BOARDING TOURNAMENT SATURDAY
This Saturday I will be holding the first annual SOJOCO water boarding tournament,. We will be using the 2008 CIA rules so that means no goggles or nose plugs. Trophies will be handed out to 2nd and 3rd place(because 1st place will probably be dead). If you are interested please email waterboardingkicksass@yahoo.com
1. Will the other side of the CIA memos be released or will Obama continue to give us half truths?
2. Axlerod lives in Wonka Land if he believes half the crap that comes out of his mouth. HEY JACKASS! Your puppet is AntiAmerican, lets fix that first before we worry about others.
3. Overweight individuals need to start hiding in attics before Obama sends his Acorn army out to round you up. According to the Emperors government you are endangering the lives of us all. This will be his first act as World Leader.
4. When the AP goes after Obama you know he is in trouble.
5. Miss California gets passed over because she is against gay marriage.
6. Lindsey Lohan will be appearing topless in Vegas...............Cya
7. Is it news when an Ethiopian and a Kenyan win the Boston Marathon? Tell me when some pasty Irishman from South Boston wins it.
8. Photos of the Craigslist Hooker killer have been released. TIP: If you don't want to be killed by this then don't whore yourself out.
9. The people that live East of 54th street in KCK have got to love the Giagantic water park and development dollars for the new water park. Of course they will be loving it from their condemend homes surrounded by Barb Wire and Pit Bulls.
10. WTF is family week? And do we really need a week for it? Stupid Hippies!
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