I am looking to fill the position of Ass Wiping Czar. There will be no interview, you need not be qualified and I will be paying a ton.
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
QUICK HITS - CRAZY BASTARDS
Here are a few stories that were so pathetic that you almost have to laugh.
1. Who woulda thought that a Czar that didn't have to be confirmed by the Senate would be investigated shortly after leaving. I mean seriously, you trust the emperors judgment, right?
2. Criminals in Mexico torture 12 Federalis and people still want to open the border.......
3. Your friendly neighborhood socialist is looking to ban "In God We Trust". Remember these are the same idiots that worship the climate so we could end up with "In Gore We Trust".
4. I am starting to think that being kidnapped in Utah isn't such a bad deal. Either you get taken 1 mile from your house and left alone or you get forced to drink beer.
5. Minority broadcasters want to be bailed out? That is just wrong on so many levels
6. Those of you that believe we landed on the moon will love this story. Those of us with a brain will see right through this propaganda.
7. Will you pay $1000 to read a book about a drunk murderer?
8. ARKANSAS, JERSEY, VOODOO, HESHE. All the ingredients needed to laugh your ass off.
9. This soldier cracks me up.
10. Some men would pay extra to get a little shock while surfing the internet.
KCMO IS FULL OF IDIOTS
- First you elect complete idiots onto your School Board
- Then you vote in a city counsel full of crooks
- AND THE CREAM OF THE CROP
- YOU VOTE THIS ASS WIPE AND HIS WIFE INTO THE MAYORS OFFICE. Holy crap this is a good read.
You should all be forced to wear dunce caps when entering JOCO.
PASTY WHITE CHICKS
This is terrible news! Without daily fake baking a lot of these chicks are going to be scary looking.
HEADLINE OF THE DAY
"“Ambassadors” work for betterment of downtown KCK"
Talk about your lost causes. Unless these ambassadors are licensed bulldozer drivers this program is doomed.
THE WIRE - RAIN WASHES THE BLOOD AWAY
Rainy weather makes for lower body counts. In its place we get boring crap.
1. What does drunken ambulance theft say about your city?
2. The word "Stymie" should never be used when discussing crime.
3. What kind of weak ass criminals bring a hammer and crowbar to a home invasion?
4. If you own an ATM on Prospect and you put more than $50 in it then you are freaking crazy. When was the last time you saw a cocaine dealer run to the ATM before a buy?
5. The East Side breaks a streak of stupid crimes and finally puts a body on the scoreboard.
Monday, July 13, 2009
QUICK HITS - CHANGE
For the rest of the summer all updates will take place after 6pm central. When the weather starts turning to crap again I will return to mornings. I will however be adding Saturday updates and continue to utilize twitter to keep you idiots informed.
Here are 10 stories for you to read while your KCMO friends try to figure out how to use their pop up books.
1. I sure hope that studying cat behavior wasn funded by the government.
2. Freedom of Speech on the internet could soon be a thing of the past.
3. NYC's finest are limo drivers for the homeless.
4. Barbara Boxer is a drama queen. Is she an Art Bell caller?
5. Whores are better fund raisers than Big Candy Bars?
6. The people of Northern Ireland are once again fighting to free their country from the Brits.
7. Showering before sex is questionable?
8. Kate Gosselin might want to think twice before copping an attitude to her replacement.
9. Cussing is healthy!!
10. What a crappy way to die.
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