Monday, November 24, 2008

THANK YOU KANSAS STATE


I would like to take a moment to thank the smart people out in Manhattan, Ks for bringing back Snyder. I was truly worried that Kansas State might go out and grab a big name coach with a lot of upside to turn their program around.

The hiring of Snyder ensures that the Purple Towel waving hillbillies to the West will remain losing.

THE WIRE - WEEKEND RECAP


I would like to thank the local crime community for keeping up their good work even though the temps continue to fall.

1. The one thing that Quick Trip doesn't offer is treatment for gunshot wounds (as this poor bastard found out). Considering this stores location they ought to consider opening up a treatment center next to the Rooster Booster stand.

2. KCMO arsonist take advantage of sinking gas prices.

3. Murder in South KC Housing projects errrrrrrrrrrr Apartment Complex

4. "POP, POP, POP" is NOT the sound of a breakfast cereal on Paseo.

As you will notice SOB MAN was busy protecting JOCO and preventing the county under his protection from making the list. Can the same be said about other local "super hero crime fighters".

Friday, November 21, 2008

JINGLE BOMBS



If it isn't too early for Christmas music on the radio then it isn't too early for Jingle Bombs on the Blog

SOB MAN IS ON IT


Today in Olathe we had yet another instance of White on White Crime. SOB MAN NEEDS YOUR HELP. If you have any information in regards to the attempted abduction of a female meter reader in Olathe please send me an email. At that time I will call a press conference and claim that I "fought" crime.

HIP HOP FLASHBACK

20 REASONS JOCO RESIDENTS SHOULD BE THANKFUL

With all the negativity on the news lately it might be hard for some of you to find reasons to be thankful. When that happens just remember that you are a JOCOIAN and you are blessed to live in a county full of growth, inclusiveness and prosperity.

It could be worst


1. Knowing that your dinner was purchased by you and not by elementary school kids from a different state and county.

2. That your county doesn't fall under the protection of Omega "Racist" Man

3. Public Schools aren't a nationwide joke

4. We have a neighboring county that will continue to flip the bill on our entertainment venues.

5. Oklahoma Joes BBQ is better than Gates or Bryants

6. We can typically live in the county that we work in.

7. We watch "A Christmas Carol" and feel bad for Tiny Tim. KCMO kids are envious of all that Tiny Tim has.

8. We don't have a single street named after a corrupt politician let alone 2.

9. We have no idea who the spouse of the Mayor of Overland Park is.

10. Our shopping district isn't built by an open Septic Tank.

11. We were smart enough to vote against BiState.

12. Our police departments don't have to order crime scene tape and chalk by the pallet.

13. It isn't NEWS if a grocery store opens in our county.

14. We can laugh everytime someone says that KCMO has "culture" and diversity and that is why they live there. The reason we laugh is becuase we know that the people saying that live in the most segregated city in the midwest and couldn't tell you how to get to the Art Museum.

15. Our kids play with Super Soakers in the summer ,not AK47's.

16. Take your kid to work day doesn't involve standing on a corner.

17. Parks Board nominations don't make national news.

18. We don't have two arenas without anchor tenants.

19. They aren't called they Overland Park Royals and the Leawood Chiefs.

20. The number 117 isn't associated with the number of murders and high school grads we have.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

PLEASE HELP SOLVE THIS CRIME


SOB MAN needs your help protecting JOCO from crime.

If you have any information regarding a muffin stolen from someones table at Starbucks this morning. Please send me an email at jocosob@yahoo.com.

Do not call the TIPS hot line. EMAIL ME FIRST! I wil call them for you.

I need some props so I can upgrade the new SOB MAN MOBILE