AMERICAN IDOL HEADLINES

Every year we seem to have scandal involving the contestants of American Idol. Their background checks must be performed by the same people that hire teachers in the metro.

1. This guy was a stripper.

2. This guy ( I think it is a guy) wants Santa to rape your mom.

Will this be in some way thought of as a plot by the white producers to rid themselves of the Latino contestants? I know one guy that will think so.

FRESH OFF HER BANKRUPTING OF KANSAS CITY

Kay Barnes is filing her papers today to make her run at congress. It was bad enough watching her run through money in KCMO like she was printing it herself but can you imagine her with federal dollars? Holy crap!

QUICK HITS

1. Mo Murda. Kansas City is going for the record and it appears that nothing is going to stop them.

2. Kansas City can't find money for anything anymore. This is the aftermath of spend at will liberals running the city for way to long. From Clever to Barnes these idiots have nearly bankrupt the city. Not that I really care. I got a new arena and some new places to go to lunch out of the deal for free. BUT why are the leaders of the KCMO gov trying to land yet another money burning project (light rail)?

3. Finally some good legislation out of Missouri. The rise of Obama can finally put an end to an outdated racist program. If he can become a presidential nominee without help........

4. Memphis slaughter. Amazing how these cowards always manage to hurt kids.

5. Firefighter that went back to get his kids happy meal toy was one of those killed at Wendy's in Florida yesterday.

6. New York does its part to fight recession in the inner city. Talk about your stimulus package!

82 YEAR OLD JACKED BY HIS SON

This poor old dude moved to Merriam to HIDE from his son. Turns out that Junior is no joke and held him up at gunpoint once he tracked him down.

WHY WE LOVE POLLOCKS

I caught this story off of Crime Scene KC. ( a must read by the way). There are so many things wrong with this story that I am not sure that I can cover them all.

1. He was caught having sex with a vacuum cleaner.
2. The Vacuum cleaner had a smiley face painted on it.
3. It is common practice for polish people to vacuum their underwear.
4. The story mentions a man caught having sex with a bicycle.

I have attached a diagram of how a vacuum is suppose to work in an effort to educate our polish brothers that might not quite get the concept of what a vacuum is suppose to do.

CHUCK E. CHEESE JUST GOT BETTER

This has some serious potential, with the right marketing. Who wouldn't pay good money to see cat fighting at Chuck E. Cheese? I think they should set up a ring in the middle of the place and allow soccer moms to duke it out. The winner could get 6 tickets and the loser would have to eat from the salad bar.

Rules:
1. Matches could take place every Saturday afternoon (after soccer games)
2. Contestants would be put into divisions based on age and weight.
3. The moron dressed up as Chuck E. Cheese would be the referee.
4. There would be 3 rounds with a 2 minute time limit.
5. Biting, pinching, hair pulling and clothes ripping are all allowed and encouraged.
6. Matches would take place in the ball pit.
7. Winners from each location would advance to the championships held at the Sprint Center (Sponsored by Chuck E. Cheese).

Seriously, this could take the place of jello wrestling.

DRILL INSTRUCTOR Martin?

THIS GUY IS A REAL MOTIVATOR

DIGGER PHELPS DANCING BEFORE KU GAME

HARLEY ROCKER VIDEO

CAR JACKING CHECK POINTS

Just an FYI...for those of you out and about this week. Two of the 300 car jacking checkpoints in KCMO will not be operational due to recent staff reductions. The temporary reduction in staff is performance related (stupidity) and these positions look to be filled quickly.

"If you build it, they will still be dumb"

The KCMO school district is about to build a "High Tech" school (insert joke here). ..... The price tag $40 million dollars. Now ask yourself, does a school district that struggles with meeting the minimum requirements need a High Tech School? When the hell are they going to get the low tech problems solved? WHAT A JOKE!

Does anyone think that giving the school board $40 million dollars is a good idea?

WENDY'S TERROR ATTACK

Once again our own home grown terrorist strike the innocent and unexpecting. This coward took it upon himself to end the lives of 2 people and injure another 5.

In related news, the streets of Baghdad are safe.

Overland Park Hates Old People

I am surprised that anything north of 119th Street was still considered Overland Park.

THE MOVE

1. The look on the movers face when they learned that the 20 -30 heavy boxes of scrap crap were going to the top floor of the new house was priceless.

2. It is impossible to diet when moving. For 7 days straight all that we had to eat was McDonalds & Pizza.

3. Unlike my friend the owl I can not turn my neck to the left or right.

4. We filled up a semi and brought no furniture (see post 1).

5. True fear hit me when it was time for them to unload my TV.

6. The cable guy spent 4 hours at my house on Friday.

7. The cable outlet for our TV in the great room quit working 10 hours later on Friday Night.

8. When we called on Saturday morning they said that they couldn't come back until Tuesday.

9. I hate Time Warner.

10. The look on the neighbors faces when I pulled into our driveway on the Harley was priceless.

11. Fences & window blinds make for good neighbors. Right now I have neither (fences or blinds).

12. The moving company that we used was great. "Father & Son's" moving is locally owned the crew we had came in well under the estimate. If you are moving use them.

QUICK HITS - Catch up

1. Smoking in bed leads to fires. This ranks up there with Turkey Fryer in Garage guy.

2. Another peaceful evening on Prospect. Is there a crappier street in all the Metro?

3. Nothing says Spring more than a Drive By shooting in KCMO. Pennsylvania can keep their ground hog.

4. I thought that ELF (turns out it was EMF)was a crappy band from the 90's. Turns out that they are a bunch of psycho earth lovers that like to torch the planet it order to save the planet. I am not sure which is worst.

5. Drug Lords vs. Oil Dictators. This war has potential. I will take Columbia and the points on this one.

6. 345,000 tons of bird crap has got to smell.

7. What happens in Vegas, Stays in Vegas. That might be true for most things but HIV & Hepatitis? This "health care facility" makes Truman med look good.

8. Bronze plaques to mark the spots where homeless people die in San Fran. How about taking the plaque money and feeding the poor bastards. Yet another Liberal idea full of symbolism over substance.